I'm sorry.
life has been crazy lately and baby stuff kinda got pushed on the back burner.
it also didn't help that my hopes rose and were dashed down when aunt Flo finally came around for a 5 day visit.
god how i hate her.
(and yes, I'm still a little angry with the man upstairs. but that's my deal with him, and not part of this little insert).
but, after aunt Flo was around for a day or two, i called my mom, in tears, and asked her if trying for me was really worth it and what made her and my dad continue to try for so long. (my mom had difficulty conceiving as well. i was her 4th conception, she had 3 miscarriages before i took hold). and lets just say that she told me what i didn't want to hear.
its not like she told me i wasn't worth it or anything. but basically i was told that i needed to throw everything out and just stop.
just. stop.
yeah right.
just stop wanting something that I've dreamed of for all of my life. just stop trying to bring someone into this world that is a combination of my spunky-loud-mouthed-attitude-filled self and my tender-hearted-good-guy-drop-dead-gorgeous-wonderful husband.
sorry marmmie, isn't going to happen.
BUT - i can tell you that support is out there. my mother-in-law is now telling me that i will conceive in October, and we will have a baby next year. my aunt is p.o.s.i.t.i.v.e. that we will be happy and fulfilled with our dream by the end of 2010. hell, even my good friend who was told there was a slim to nil chance that they would conceive was prego for a while (she sadly miscarried twins).
so with my new support, Ryan and i went to my accupressurist/acupuncturist for a treatment. i asked to be treated for my mom, not planning on baby stuff, but no, Mala would have none of it.
this is my treatment list for that sessions-
prolactin - effects ovulation and menstrual cycle
progesterone - softens your uterine lining, helping with implantation
hcg -works to increase the number of eggs that are released from your follicles every month
vitamin e - increases egg quality
luteinizing hormone - causing your follicles to rupture and release eggs
semen - specifically my husbands. he sat in my session for the first time. i was very touched.
and i bruised for the semen and the progesterone, as well as the emotional chakra.
making babies takes an army.
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